There and back again

I don't know who's more nervous.  Me or the Juffin.  He races off to get the car and I start the long and lonely trek from Mount Doom back to the Shire.  Just kidding, I'm not lonely, my Mum is with me, but it feels like I have to walk about a gazillion kilometres from the maternity ward to the carpark carrying the Mushroom and I'm totally channeling Frodo right now.  In fact, I feel like I'm going to perish, walking is hard!  Please bear in mind that the biggest distance I've walked in the last 4 days is from the bed to the toilet.  A round trip of about 2 metres.  This is bordering on cruel and unusual punishment as the maternity ward is at least 600 or 700 metres from the hospital entrance.  How fucking ridiculous!  No-one offers to get me a wheelchair or anything so I guess that's out of the question so foot falcon it is.  Luckily Juffin and my wonderful Mother have loaded themselves up with all the bags, flowers etc so all I have to do is concentrate on carrying the Mushroom and putting one foot in front of the other.

We finally make it to the front entrance and let me tell you, we're not breaking any land speed records.  I gratefully collapse onto a seat and then remember too late that it hurts to stand up and sit down unaided so that was a stupid move.  I grimace away as people look at me fondly.  Yes, people are staring at me and smiling.  I thought people were just being encouraging inside as I limped my way through the hospital but now I've noticed that it's this weird baby thing.  If you're carrying a little bebbeh around, random people smile at you.  Like a lot.  It's really bizarre and unsettling at first and I'm trying not to be weirded out by everyone's attention.  Is this what it's like to be a celebrity?!  The Mushroom seems to be coping just fine, despite all the unwanted attention, and I just ignore everyone and enjoy being outside, even if it is a little on the warm side.  

Juffin soon arrives and it's time to wrangle the tiny man into the giant car seat.  I have no idea what to do and can provide zero assistance whatsoever.  I'm bossily told to get into the car and sit down so, for once, decide to do what I'm told.  My Mother informs me that the Juffin is shaking as he tries to maneuver the Mushroom into the seat securely and I just close my eyes and vow not to interfere.  I'm in too much discomfort to be a bossy britches anyway.  He's finally in, seatbelt engaged, and we can push off, hooray!  Double hooray, as there are several cars lined up behind us all giving us the equivalent of a Voldemort death stare.  Arsehats.  Where's your stupid smiley faces at the baby now?!  Some people have no patience, geez!

On the way home Juffin informs me that he will be cooking me a medium-rare steak tonight for tea.  I nearly swoon.  Yummy!  I haven't had a bloody piece of steak since finding out I was pregnant, I love this man.  We make it home incident free and we manage to extricate the Mushroom without dismembering him and   he's still sleeping soundly, bonus.  Actually I could do with a rest myself.  I just walked 700 metres.  It was a long way.  I enter our home to find that Juffin has cleaned from top to bottom.  The floors are vacuumed and mopped, dishes are all done, the washing is folded, he's washed and changed the sheets, and moved our bedroom around so the baby hammock is next to me and I can get to our Mushroom easily.  I nearly cry.  What an amazing man!  I'm so grateful as he urges me into the bedroom and promptly tucks me up into bed for a rest with Mushroom laying in the day bed beside me.  We promptly pass out.

Mushroom in his baby hammock

I don't remember much from that first night, just overwhelmed to be back at home and on our own.  I do know that I enjoyed a delicious medium-rare steak and cuddles with my man for the first time in a few days and after we enjoyed our 2 minutes of adult time, we then embarked on a 3 hourly feeding schedule for Mushroom... oh how our lives have changed!!

Next time:  Breastfeeding = challenge, and the baby blues :-(